I seriously cannot believe it's 2015 already, can you see how fast time flies? How am I a senior now, what even. Well, as usual the typical "New Year New Me" kind of post. To make up my mind to be a better person, resolutions is something I'll set for myself. Let's just see if I manage to make a change and see the differences by the end of the year. (Well..hopefully)
#1 Have a better attitude towards things/people.
This is definitely the first thing I want myself to work on to. To not have the kind of suckish attitude when problems came ahead of me or things that's challenging me. I often get really pissed off at people and mad at things when they don't work my way or didn't turn out to be something I wanted them to be.
#2 Stop procrastinate about everything.
I swear I procrastinate a lot. I did that somehow too much until the stage where people stop trusting me anymore, which is a bad thing. "Its now or never." Do it now or you'll never get the chance to. I really need to keep that in mind though.
#3 Be respectful and understandable.
Well? This is between my parents and I. I need to stop arguing over them over small matters and try to understand why they're doing what they doing is for my own good. For example: The disapproval of hangouts. I suppose I'm not the only one having problem like this where parents get overprotective of their teen child at times or get annoyed and complained about how they're like a driver needing to drive us everywhere or they're busy, it's crashing with their schedules.
#4 Appreciate what I have.
I always urge for something more or want to have that something new although the bad ones are still in a good condition. And when I get what I want, it'll still never be enough. I have to stop focusing on what I don't have and appreciate what I already have instead. Compared to those kids in Africa I'm so much luckier, this have to always be reminded.
#5 Figure out my life.
This can be also classify as figuring myself out, of what I'm really interested in and what I'm passionate about. It's really saddening and often depressing of how I don't know what I'm going to do with my life and I'm basically a lifeless dork who have no idea what is she living for. It's something I really need to figure out and focus on since it's my life and no one's living my life for me except me. I have to do it for myself. "Y.O.L.O"
#6 Do not waste time doing nothing.
Let me tell you something. I've been literally doing nothing for I'm on a summer school holiday. I've repeated this for so many times and always ended up regretting for not spending my holidays wisely. Time is gold, it's precious. It can't be bought or sold. Making everyday as productive as I can is one of the goals I'm setting for myself. You wouldn't wanna know my everyday lifeless routine, its so plain and meaningless. It's all waking up from bed, checking phone and spending hours sitting in front of a laptop. It's a cycle I want it to end.
#7 Do not take people for granted.
Especially the loved ones. I'll start loving people around me more, spreading them love and give them the best I've got. I somehow did not care about people as much as I wish myself to and just let them slip pass me without giving a damn. I need to change that. No one knows what'll happen next and I definitely don't need anymore regrets in my life.
#8 Make family members aka my parents proud.
This is something I've been wanting to achieve for years, and none of it that I've done happen to make them proud sadly to say. It's a must to have at least ONE achievement on this! It couldn't be that hard, could it?
#9 Think more mature and grow some balls.
Let me make things clear regarding to "grow some balls". It's a way of describing "to be brave" so don't ever misunderstand on that eh. So, I've been quite immature for a teen my age and is afraid to take risks in life. Being girly and feet-stomping like a 3 y/o over some shit is not something I want to be; owning a mature thinking brain is what I want. More to that, I swear I've been given countless of opportunities but I wasn't dare to take the risks. I've no idea what I'm afraid of, I just know that I won't let them slip away easily again.
#10 BE HAPPY!
They're in capital letters because it matters the most compared to all of that above. Living happily everyday is literally the goal of my life. I get emotionally depressed and mentally exhausted so often its almost happening every now and then. The thing is that it always happened without a reason. Those midnights where sudden memories come hitting me hard in the chest. Having nowhere to escape and no one to hold on to is what makes the depression even more worse.
The resolutions finally come to an end. Well if I somehow spoiled your mood or gotten you bored I'm sorry about that. Anyhow, I hope I'm not too late to do the wishing new year thing hehe. To YOU who's reading this right now, have a new refreshing year, create amazing moments and seek for unforgettable journey tgt with your loved ones. Here's to more fun and joyfully year ahead of us, HAPPY 2015! x